Once we decide that our words should influence and not simply inform, we have given our message a very different mission. We craft our remarks to avoid negative reactions; the sort of response that might be triggered by more candid language that is less concerned with feelings and outcomes.
This crafting might indeed get us to our goal or it may nudge us off the bridge and into a deep chasm.
A key task as communicators is knowing whether our primary concern is informing or influencing. A key task for the listener is knowing the same thing about us.