Wednesday, September 24, 2008

Management Free Form

We messed up that last project but let's not talk about it with the boss because Lord knows how he/she/it will react so the wise guys say to just move on and hope that nothing was noticed and that the blame will drift off to some other department which is probably hoping that the blame for their blunders comes our way, the weasels, so if anything sticks to them it serves them right for not being team players and if the question is raised why didn't we do anything we can reply that we sent out a memo or held a staff meeting or sent someone off to be trained and that should quiet them down although we all know that those actions will do nothing other than quiet them down, at least for a while, and when we recruit let's act normal during the interview and then when the new fish has been here for three days we can start to let the word out about how Ed is crazier than a loon and Maria is a back-stabber and how we all hate the boss even though we didn't act that way while on the oral board because we needed someone else in here to help do the work as the boss likes teams so we form a lot of them and give them special names like Tigers and Bears and make sure they are diverse and they are diverse alright except the main diversity is between the two people who do most of the work and the rest who can barely show up for meetings and the one psycho who actively tries to sabotage the effort so you might think that we'd want to fire anyone who is not pitching in and that would be true unless we like the person or the lawyers tell us we'll have to document and document - they don't have to work with the jerk - until the person is three hours short of retirement and then why would you want to fire someone with that much seniority and besides it might trigger an age discrimination case, besides the oaf probably won't stay that long anyway because everyone's looking around and if you dress more than casual you can bet the jokers in the elevator will ask if you've got an interview today, which is no surprise because people talk about how much better things are elsewhere and the company is always talking up its quality program but we've caught on that the people who work the hardest just get more work and are paid about the same as the slugs and so we figure that all that quality talk must be another flavor of the month and that in no time the CEO will be into some other best-seller he read on the way to Hawaii - ha! - we're not buying any of that smoke because if you haven't noticed we're pretty street savvy and know all the moves or think we do and that's good enough.

2 Comments:

At 6:52 PM, Anonymous Jonathan said...

If Jack Kerouac had been in management....

 
At 9:56 AM, Blogger Michael Wade said...

I think Jack is in managment.

 

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