Schmoozing

I grew up in a results-oriented household. "I don't want to hear any alibis" was uttered so many times by my father that we later considered putting it on his tombstone. ("Tell them to go to hell" was another contender.)

An underlying message was that you'll be judged by your work and that if your work is excellent, you'll accordingly reap rewards.

Such advice has its merits but it is also naive if the definition of work is drawn so narrowly that schmoozing is omitted. Unless you have a job that could be performed by a hermit - and some people do - you have to be able to get along with people and people crave attention. It's perfectly understandable to prefer doing business with a friend instead of a stranger and frequently we only have a passing acquaintanceship with many of our co-workers, especially those in other departments.

Some people - I used to be one - dismiss schmoozing as a waste of time; the sort of activity that many a goof-off has passed off as work. It can certainly be abused. Those who largely define their jobs as pressing the flesh are often wrong but there are jobs that are precisely that. The rainmakers who bring in work to law firms and other businesses may spend a considerable amount of time on golf courses and at community dinners but they can bring in work that the busy beavers back at the office would otherwise miss.

If you are a shy person, you may have to nudge yourself to schmooze. It won't come naturally. But it can make a huge difference in your career and in the development of your personality. Some people need to come back from the cocktail lounges and long lunches and hit the in-box. Others need to get out there and grab a latte with a new friend. We schedule our work. We also need to book schmooze time.